The Map of Parenting

When we become parents,  many of us are desperate for there to be a map. Something that tells us what to do in every moment and ultimately promises us that our children will turn out ok. 

There are days when we think we’ve found the map and we are on track! And there are days when the map has disappeared and we are at sea. 

If only we could be told what to do and feel reassured that everything we are doing is right!

The Truth

1. Our children are unique 
2. We are unique as parents 

The combination of these two things means there isn’t a map and if we do find a map, it isn’t accurate enough. Even the map of our own upbringing will not always point us in the right direction. 

When we are feeling lost, we desperately want someone to tell us what to do, however, when we are told what to do, it lets us off the hook. There is someone or something to blame and we don’t have to think for ourselves (the same is true when we tell our children what to do).

Instead of searching for a traditional map, we need to embrace a new map that will reassure us at every age and stage.

This map will remind us to:

• Stop looking for the right answer
• Feel our way as we go
• Keep going when it’s tough
• Keep showing up when we are lost
• Get better at forgiveness (especially of ourselves)
• Let go of being responsible for everything.
• See the lighter side of life
• Have fun trying!

Which one of these ideas most resonates for you today and is there any other wisdom you would add to this list?